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The Princess and The Prosthetic

Life After Becoming a Mama

June 13, 2019 in Family, Motherhood - No Comments

Everyone said life would change.

They held my hand and looked at my growing tummy and smiled.  They shared stories, advice, and tried to convey the drastic shift that was going to come to my life after giving birth.

I already anticipated some of that change.  I’d read the books, seen all the cute quotes, and I naively thought I had a handle on just how much life would change.

I had already imagined our baby sleeping in their crib, tucking them in and turning on the mobile above at night.

I had already imagined strapping them into the Baby Bjorn that my husband would wear when we did our walks in the park on the weekend.

I imagined the baby in the high chair in the kitchen, even imagining what we would do when the baby got fussy.

I didn’t take time to imagine how I would feel though.

The complete wave of fragility that I felt after Callie was born.  My body and mind had just gone through a complete upheaval.  Completely turned inside out in all essence of the word.  The modicum of privacy and modesty I normally craved was completely gone as I grabbed the doctor’s hand and just told them to do what was needed to do to save Callie.

I felt like a warrior.  Strong.  Powerful.  I went through almost 12 hours of labor and most of it was without any pain medicine.  I brought a new little human into the world and was in absolute wonder at what women can do.  How beautifully fierce, masterful, and capable we are.

Hands

I felt raw.  All of my emotions were heightened times ten.  All of my previous understanding of love, sadness, joy, pride, protectiveness, and fear paled in comparison  with what I was feeling the day of her birth.  This was love.  This was pride.  This was joy.  Every color was brighter than I’d ever seen.  Every sound magnified.  Lines were sharper.  Curves were softer.  She was perfect and whole.   Time slowed down and once we met with the doctors I understood what true fear, terror and heartbreak felt like, each grabbing my heart in a closed fist grip.

I felt like I was just inducted into part of a new club.  A new club of mothers.  The word “generation” meant something different now as did legacy.  That day, I could feel that interwoven twine that connects mothers and their babies and it made more sense to me than it ever had.  I understood the links to my past and those memories of others that we had carried with us from before.  I understood that this baby, Callie Grace, would be the dot that would connect the lines from generation to generation.

I felt a new love for my husband.  Seeing him step into the role of father, becoming her protector and the quiet tender love he showed our baby girl was like falling in love all over again.  On that day, he became her hero, her biggest fan, her advocate, and her best friend and I got to witness that.  I always knew he was an amazing husband but on that day I fell in love with him as a father. Up until that day, he had my whole heart but seeing him rock her in the NICU, it was if I was looking at the newly formed two halves of my heart and I knew that the world and how I traveled through it was utterly and profoundly changed forever……..

CallieBaby2

 

Jaime

Hi everyone! Thanks so much for stopping by! My name is Jaime! Wife to my better half, James, who is my moon and all of my stars. We are parents to our little warrior princess, Callie Grace. We started this blog to share our journey as we navigate through our crazy beautiful life. Callie is a lower limb amputee and I am a Type One Diabetic. We are hoping to change the face of beauty one step at a time! We hope by sharing our story, you leave with a little bit more inspiration and hope! Thank you so much for stopping by and joining our tribe!

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About Me

About Me

Jaime

Hi Y'all! I’m Jaime, a proud working mama, author, girl boss and wifey to an ultra-adorable husband. I am a huge book nerd, I drink coffee like my life depends on it, and run on dry shampoo and Amazon Prime. Leopard print is my favorite color. I am a story teller at heart and this blog is a virtual scrapbook of our crazy beautiful life. I'm a Type One Diabetic and our little warrior princess Callie is a lower limb amputee. By sharing how we’ve chosen to flourish in the garden we’ve been planted in, we hope you can take some small nuggets of hope, inspiration, and laughter. We are so grateful that you’ve found us—welcome to the fam. We embrace our perfectly imperfect lives and don’t let the doctor’s appointments, spreadsheets, speaking engagements, 10th birthday parties to plan, housework or date nights overwhelm us. Those things are just the beautiful reminders of all the blessings in our lives. Read More

Jaime

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